It’s hard to believe that another year has come and gone!  I count my blessings that I have such wonderful people in my life who support and love me (or at least I think they do! hehe)  Even though I may be another year older, have a few more creaks in my joints, gained a few more pounds and have a few more gray hairs, I can’t complain.  It’s been a wonderful year (with many more to come)!  I won’t say how old I am, but I will say it’s getting closer to that 1/2 century mark!  Oi!  So cheers to everyone!

Baby Gayle

Teen Gayle

Young Woman Gayle

Gayle - Today

Bella will be leaving tomorrow for a week to show in the AKC dog shows in Montana.  Domino got his major in Montana, so we are crossing our fingers that Bella will win her first points here!  Wish her luck!

Bruce and I will miss the little fart while she is gone.  This will be her first time away from home.  So hopefully she will do well and not think too much about her brother Domino and her mommy and daddy.

Good luck Bella!!!

1.  Don’t buy a putter until you’ve had a chance to throw it.

2.  Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing.

3.  When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.

4.  If you’re afraid a full shot might reach the green while the foursome ahead of you is still putting out, you have two options: you can immediately shank a lay-up or you can wait until the green is clear and top a ball halfway there.

5.  The less skilled the player, the more likely he is to share his ideas about the golf swing.

6.  No matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse.

7.  The inevitable result of any golf lesson is the instant elimination of the one critical unconscious motion that allowed you to compensate for all of your many other errors

8.  A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponents’ luck.

9.  Nonchalant putts count the same as chalant putts

10. It’s not a gimme if you’re still away.

11. The shortest distance between any two points on a golf course is a straight line that passes directly through the center of a very large tree.

12. You can hit a two acre fairway 10% of the time and a two inch branch 90% of the time.

13. Since bad shots come in groups of three, a fourth bad shot is actually the beginning of the next group of three.

14. When you look up, causing an awful shot, you will always look down again at exactly the moment when you ought to start watching the ball if you ever want to see it again.

15. Every time a golfer makes a birdie, he must subsequently make two triple bogies to restore the fundamental equilibrium of the universe.

16. Hazards attract; fairways repel.

17. A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours.

18. If there is a ball on the fringe and a ball in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker. If both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint

19. A good drive on the 18th hole has stopped many a golfer from giving up the game.

20. A good golf partner is one who’s always slightly worse than you are.

21. If there’s a storm rolling in, you’ll be having the game of your life.

22. Golf balls are like eggs. They’re white. They’re sold by the dozen. And you need to buy fresh ones each week.

23. If your opponent has trouble remembering whether he shot a six or a seven, he probably shot an eight (or worse).

24. It takes longer to learn to be a good golfer than it does to become a brain surgeon.  On the other hand, you don’t get to ride around on a cart and eat hot dogs if you are performing brain surgery!

Very clever….never thought of doing this….could save you some time and money!

Watch….

Great Tip

My nephew just graduated from high school this last Saturday!  He will be attending Otterbein college next year and will also play soccer for them!  Congratulations Adam and best wishes!

A father passing by his son’s bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to ‘Dad.’

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.  I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.  But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it’ s not only the passion…Dad she’s pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.  She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone. We’ll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don’t worry Dad. I’m 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I’m sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love, Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I’m over at Tommy’s house.  I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a report card that’s in my center desk drawer.

I love you.

Call me when it’s safe to come home.

Mary Ujifusa

One year ago today, my grandmother passed away.  Today I am posting this blog in remembrance of such a wonderful woman, mother, grandmother and great grandmother.

You are dearly missed grandma.  May you rest in peace.

This is an old video, but still very funny!  Watch out ladies…you never know what to expect when you get pulled over by a cop!

Gotta love the black net stockings and garters!    

Dear Consumas:

It has come ta our attention dat a cupola copies of the Windows XP New Joisey Edition may have been shipped outsida Joisey. If ya got one a dese, youse may need some help unnerstanin da commands. Da Joisey edition may be recognized by da unique openin’ screen. It reads: “Windas XP”, wit a background pitcha a Hoboken. When youse start da program, instead a da usual stringy like music, you hear a little Springsteen. It’s also shipped wit a Sopranos screen sava.

Please also note:

*Recycle bin is labeled “Newark”

*My Computer is called “My Friggin’ Computa”

*The Inbox is referred to as “Da Trunk”

*Deleted items are referred to as “Wacked”, “Erased” or “Rubbed Out”

*Control Panel is known as “The Bosses”

* Performing an “illegal operation” is known as “Enhancin’ da Family Business” and will actually maximize da program instead a shuttin’ it down

*Hard Drive is referred to as “Da Turnpike on Da Way to Da Shore”

*Instead of an error message, “You Ain’t Gonna Friggin’ Believe Dis’” pops up.

Changes in Terminology in Da Joisey Edition:

OK . . . . Sure ting
Cancel . . . . Fugetaboutit
Reset .. . . . Start ova
Yes . . . . Yeah
No . . . . Nah
Find . . . . Put a Contract Out On it
Browse . . . . Get a Looksee
Back . . . . U-Toin
Help .. . . . Get Your Own Friggin’ Ansa
Stop . . . .Knock it Off
Start . . . . Move it
Settings . . . . Here’s da Rules

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you mistakenly got a copy of the Joisey Edition (not). You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version. You gotta problem wit dat?

What is PVC?  Yes, it is commonly known as the vinyl called polyvinyl chloride used in many items and is considered very poisonous.  However, that is not the PVC that I am referring to in this blog entry.

Not many have heard of PVC from a health perspective.  The acronym “PVC” stands for Premature ventricular contractions” or also known as Premature ventricular complexes, ventricular premature beats, ectopic heartbeats and extrasystoles.  PVC are extra, abnormal heartbeats that begin in one of your heart’s two lower pumping chambers (ventricles). These extra beats disrupt your regular heart rhythm, which normally starts in the upper right chamber (atrium).  These extra contractions usually beat sooner than the next regular heartbeat. And they often interrupt the normal order of pumping.  As a result, the extra, out-of-sync beats (which may feel like a flip-flop or skipped beat in your chest) are usually less effective in pumping blood throughout the body.  Premature ventricular contractions are very common and most people never feel them.

So what causes PVC and irregular heartbeats?  Certain triggers such as heart diseases or changes in the body can make the ventricles electrically unstable. Underlying heart disease or scarring may also cause electrical impulses to be mis-routed. Premature ventricular contractions may be associated with:

• Chemical changes or imbalances in the body
• Certain medications, including common asthma medications
• Alcohol or illegal drugs
• Increased levels of adrenaline in the body, caused by caffeine, exercise or anxiety
• Injury to the heart muscle from coronary artery disease, congenital heart disease, high blood pressure or infections (myocarditis)

So why am I writing about PVC and show so much interest in this medical condition especially when it is so common?

A few years ago, I was diagnosed with PVC.  It started after the birth of my first child.  I thought I was having a heart attack and was having some very weird sensations in my chest.  They ran a myriad of tests on me – ECGs, Holter Monitor, Event recorder, etc. — all to no avail.  Every test that I was subjected to either came back normal, or the event monitors were never able to record the event when it happened.  Doctors pretty much dismissed that I had any condition since I was in good health and had no precondition issues such as high blood pressure, heart disease or high cholesterol.  Talk about frustration!  This only added to my anxiety, hence creating more PVC attacks.  It was a vicious cycle.

I knew that I was experiencing something abnormal but I learned to live with it.  I was never diagnosed with the condition until years later.  Because the events were happening more and more, I decided that I would go back to the doctor and have it rechecked.  The first visits to the doctors (when I was first having the attacks), I lived in northern California.  I had then moved to Washington and this is where I was diagnosed with having PVCs.  My Internist took my concerns very seriously and never underestimated my condition or concerns.  He too ran the same set of tests to no avail.  We finally ended up with me doing a stress test (or what is known as an Exercise Stress EKG).  The PVC event occurred while I was doing the stress test and he was able to see the results and make a diagnosis!  He was so ecstatic and so was I!  Luckily, my PVCs are benign.  However, I need to watch or be aware of my events and make sure that they do not get worse or occur too frequently.  You can choose to control the condition with heart medications, but I opted not to do this.  Instead I chose to change my lifestyle and try to stay away from things that trigger an attack (caffeine, alcohol, stress, anxiety).

The risks of having PVC are that you are at a higher risk of developing serious heart rhythm problems.  And frequent and uncontrolled premature contractions can lead to chaotic, dangerous heart rhythms and possibly sudden cardiac death.

So, if you ever notice, that I never drink any high energy or caffeinated drinks.  I do drink alcohol, but when I over do it, my heart and body take the beating and it takes me a few days for my heart to feel normal again.  I love my dark chocolate, so I haven’t given that up!  And I try very hard to keep my stress levels down.

There you have it!  PVC 101!  I hope you were able to take away some knowledge by my experiences.  It’s not a fun condition to live with, but it is something that you can live with.  There are far worse things out there and I feel blessed that overall, my health is pretty good.